Coach with Steph

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My learning experience…

I caught myself doing something today. Something that, in the past, I probably wouldn’t have noticed I was doing and would’ve just gone about my day. Something that I didn’t like and reflected the person that I didn’t want to be.

What was that something?

I found myself judging someone based on their weight. I was in a public place and heard huffing and puffing behind me. I slowly turned around, and it was a gentleman walking very slowly to the bathroom. My brain immediately went to “You’d be able to breathe better and move quickly if you weren’t so big. You shouldn’t even be in here anyway.” (I was in Shake Shack grabbing a bite.)

Ouch! Who said that?

I froze and looked around as if someone had said it out loud! Crap, that was me…saying it to myself.

Uh, that is not who I want to be!!

I immediately started judging myself! I’m a Life Coach; I should know better! Who am I to judge? I’m not exactly thin! I’m a horrible person! I’m so mean!

Thankfully, that whole scenario all happened very quickly. I was able to stop myself from all of those thoughts and feelings, pause, take a deep breath, and have a little talk with myself. I reminded myself that I am human. That I have human imperfections. That I am constantly learning and evolving.

In the past, I would have finished up my snack and headed out of Shake Shack without another thought about…well, my thought. I’m glad I didn’t do that. I’m so glad I caught myself and recognized what I was thinking. That is NOT who I want to be. I don’t want to be the person who judges others by their appearance. I don’t want to believe what is portrayed by the media and social media as what a person is “supposed” to look like. I want to be kind, supportive, empathetic, accepting, and encouraging of others!

I also don’t want to be the person who judges and beats herself up because thoughts like these pop into my head now and then. As I said, I am human. Humans are perfectly imperfect….why would I expect myself to be any other way? I’ve only learned to be aware of my thoughts and that I could change them three years ago! I should be proud of myself for catching it, taking responsibility, and moving on.

So, this is a reminder that thoughts like these will pop into your head at times. You will judge someone because of their weight, clothes, social status, etc. You, too, are imperfectly human.

Since you are still reading this, I am going to make the assumption that you don’t want to think and feel that way. You can change it!
When you find yourself in that situation, I’d like to encourage you to pause, take a breath and reflect on what you're thinking and how that makes you feel. You may start judging yourself as I did, but you don’t have to continue with that, either. Be gentle with yourself. Grab your journal and a pen and write it all out. Use the opportunity to learn about yourself and grow. That’s what I am doing!!

I’d love to help you work through this process. I’d love to help you learn about yourself! Click on the link to schedule a free consultation with me!! xoxo